Life After Divorce: Navigating Financial Independence

Divorce is a complex process that affects all aspects of our lives, not least our financial situation. I remember standing in the kitchen of my new apartment post-divorce, feeling an overwhelming sense of dread. My financial safety net was gone, and for the first time, I was solely responsible for myself and my child.

I felt a mixture of emotions: fear, uncertainty, but also a strange sense of freedom. This was my chance to start anew, to build the life I wanted for myself and my daughter. But the journey to financial independence seemed like a steep uphill climb.

The first step was to redefine my financial identity. During my marriage, we had shared finances, and most of our financial decisions were made collectively. Suddenly, I was the sole decision-maker, and every financial decision, no matter how small, weighed heavily on me.

I started by taking stock of my financial situation. I made a list of all my income sources, expenses, assets, and liabilities. Seeing everything laid out clearly was intimidating, but it also gave me a starting point. It allowed me to identify my financial goals and create a plan to achieve them.

Budgeting as a single person was a completely new challenge. I had to manage household expenses, childcare, groceries, bills, all on a single income. It was tight, and there were many months when I struggled to make ends meet.

During this time, I became a budgeting queen. I tracked every penny, looked for ways to reduce expenses, and learned to prioritize needs over wants. It was tough, but with each passing month, I became more confident in my ability to manage my finances.

Once I had a handle on my budget, I started thinking about the future. I knew I needed to save and invest, not just for myself, but for my daughter’s future. I started researching different investment options, learning about stocks, bonds, and retirement accounts.

Investing was a scary prospect, especially since my financial situation was already stretched thin. But I knew it was a critical step towards financial independence. I started small, investing a tiny portion of my income each month. As I became more comfortable with investing, I gradually increased the amount.

This slow and steady approach not only helped me grow my savings but also gave me a sense of control and optimism about my financial future.

Looking back, my divorce was one of the most challenging experiences of my life. But it also forced me to take control of my finances and taught me valuable lessons about money management.

In the end, my journey to financial independence was about more than just money. It was about rediscovering my resilience, building confidence, and laying the groundwork for a secure and fulfilling future.

For anyone going through a similar transition, remember that financial independence is a journey, not a destination. There will be setbacks and challenges along the way, but with perseverance, patience, and a lot of budgeting, you can navigate the path to financial stability and independence.


  • Lily Kensington

    Lily Kensington is a financial psychologist, a proud member of the ANZA Psychological Society, and a passionate advocate for financial wellness. A former high school English teacher and psychology graduate, Lily brings a unique perspective to her writing that blends the intricacies of psychology with the world of finance.Over the past decade, Lily has dedicated her life to helping individuals and couples navigate their emotional relationship with money. Her empathetic and intuitive approach, honed through her counselling practice, breaks down complex financial concepts into relatable and practical advice. Lily's writing often reflects her personal journey as a single mother, providing valuable insights and support for fellow single parents navigating the world of personal finance.In addition to her numerous contributions to wellness and personal development blogs, Lily is the author of the book "The Heart of Money: A Psychological Guide to Financial Wellness."In front of the camera or behind the pen, Lily's mission remains the same: to help others achieve financial peace by understanding the psychology of money.

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