10 Financial Questions You Should Ask Before Moving In Together

Taking that significant step of moving in together is a thrilling leap of faith that blends emotions, lives, and of course, finances. It’s a venture into uncharted waters, filled with the joy of sharing space and the complexity of intertwining monetary matters. It’s about love and trust, but also about dollars and cents. These intricate financial threads can either weave a warm blanket or turn into tangled knots.

So, before you pack those bags and sign the lease, consider these ten insightful financial questions, arranged to guide you from the practical to the profound:

10. “What Happens if We Win the Lottery?”

Humorous as it may sound, discussing how you’d handle sudden wealth is a revealing window into your partner’s values and spending habits. Would they splurge on a lavish vacation or invest in real estate? Understanding each other’s hypothetical spending can surprisingly unearth deeper truths about financial dreams and expectations.

9. “Who Pays for the Unexpected?”

Life is filled with unexpected turns, and finances are no exception. From sudden car repairs to unexpected medical bills, knowing how to handle these surprises together can save both headaches and heartaches later on. Deciding beforehand whether to split costs, use an emergency fund, or lean on insurance can make these bumps in the road less jarring.

8. “Shall We Keep Individual Accounts, Joint Accounts, or Both?”

It’s a question that might seem mundane but holds the key to daily financial harmony. Deciding on individual or joint bank accounts is an essential step in defining the boundaries of financial independence within a relationship. It’s not just about where the money goes, but also about how it reflects your shared values and trust.

7. “How Will We Handle Debt?”

Debt is a reality for many, and it’s a subject that requires delicate handling. Knowing how to approach existing debt, whether to pay it off together or keep it separate, can eliminate future resentment. It’s a crucial conversation that sets the stage for financial transparency and trust.

6. “What Are Our Long-Term Financial Goals?”

This question helps you align your financial compasses and sail towards shared dreams. Whether it’s buying a home, investing in a business, or planning for retirement, knowing where you both want to go makes the journey smoother and more fulfilling. It’s not just about the destination but about the shared vision that will guide your decisions along the way.

5. “How Do We Determine Our Living Standards?”

Finding harmony in your shared life requires understanding what each partner values in terms of lifestyle and comfort. Discussing living standards means aligning on everything from the type of housing you desire to how often you dine out or travel. These seemingly mundane choices can lead to tensions if not addressed, and by finding a common ground, you create a shared framework for joy and satisfaction.

4. “How Will We Handle Family Financial Support?”

Family can be a complex part of financial planning. Whether it’s supporting aging parents or contributing to a sibling’s education, understanding each other’s commitments and boundaries is vital. It can be a delicate topic, touching on deep loyalties and emotional ties. But by facing it together, you build a united front that honors both individual responsibilities and shared values.

3. “What Are Our Views on Risk and Investment?”

Investing together can be an exciting journey, but only if you’re on the same page about risk tolerance and investment strategies. Understanding whether one of you is an aggressive investor while the other prefers a conservative approach can prevent future conflicts. It’s about finding a balance that allows growth without straining the relationship with unnecessary stress.

2. “How Will We Approach Parenthood and Children’s Expenses?”

If children are part of your future plans, knowing how to navigate the financial aspect of parenthood can be enlightening. From education to healthcare, children bring a new layer of complexity to finances. A shared vision for their upbringing, aligned with your financial capacities and values, creates a nurturing environment where love and wisdom flourish.

1. “How Do We Define Financial Infidelity, and What Are Its Boundaries?”

At the core of your financial relationship lies trust, and nothing can erode that trust faster than financial infidelity. It’s a term that might be unfamiliar, but its implications can be profound. From secret accounts to hidden spending, defining what constitutes financial betrayal in your relationship is the cornerstone of honesty and transparency. It’s not merely a question of money; it’s about faith, integrity, and the unspoken contract that binds your lives.

These questions are not mere checkmarks on a list; they are doors into the heart of your shared existence. They reveal, guide, and sometimes even challenge, urging you towards a relationship that thrives not just in romance but in the real, tactile world of dollars and cents. Together, they form a compass that leads to a relationship as sound as it is loving. With these questions as your guide, you’re not just moving in together; you’re building a life.


  • Lily Kensington

    Lily Kensington is a financial psychologist, a proud member of the ANZA Psychological Society, and a passionate advocate for financial wellness. A former high school English teacher and psychology graduate, Lily brings a unique perspective to her writing that blends the intricacies of psychology with the world of finance.Over the past decade, Lily has dedicated her life to helping individuals and couples navigate their emotional relationship with money. Her empathetic and intuitive approach, honed through her counselling practice, breaks down complex financial concepts into relatable and practical advice. Lily's writing often reflects her personal journey as a single mother, providing valuable insights and support for fellow single parents navigating the world of personal finance.In addition to her numerous contributions to wellness and personal development blogs, Lily is the author of the book "The Heart of Money: A Psychological Guide to Financial Wellness."In front of the camera or behind the pen, Lily's mission remains the same: to help others achieve financial peace by understanding the psychology of money.

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